


Frozen Soul

by irismoon



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-11
Updated: 2014-10-28
Packaged: 2018-02-16 22:55:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 8,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2287529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/irismoon/pseuds/irismoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sandor Clegane has lived the past few years of the war in peace and solitude on the Quiet Isle.  When he hears news of Sansa Stark being found alive and well at the Wall, he begins to be plagued with disturbing dreams of the girl screaming in the snow.  Making the long journey to the North to be reunited with his little bird, he finds instead the greatest horror of his life.</p><p>I suck at Summaries.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently I felt the need to punish myself with yet another WIP story. I am trying hard to finish up portraits and Romeo and Juliet, but this idea would not leave my head so i started typing and got about half of it finished. I will try and finish this quicker than the others I promise. And yes someday I plan on returning to Battlescars and revamping it and finishing it up. :)
> 
> It all belongs to GRRM. 
> 
> Spoilers thru all the books and current seasons of the show to be safe.
> 
> I don't have a beta so hopefully this is not too much of a mess.
> 
> Also I adore all my reviews and comments, but I am very bad at responding to them because other than posting I am almost always on AO3 from my phone and i dont like to type on it. Just wanted to give a shoutout to all my loyal readers who do so much to encourage me along the way.

Sandor Clegane sat sipping at the mug of mulled wine the black brother had brought him. The drink warmed him but he had abstained from drinking for too long and feared his thirst for the wine returning to him. Across from him sat the Lord Commander of the Nights Watch, Jon Snow, the Little Birds bastard brother. He had journeyed all the way to the Wall through the heavy snows of winter after word had reached him that Sansa Stark had finally been found and was safe with King Stannis at the Wall. For months after the news reached him at the Quiet Isle he had been plagued with dreams of the girl. Dreams where she was screaming for him surrounded by the blinding white snow. Finally he could take no more, bid goodbye to his silent brothers and left the safety of the holy place.

The journey was long and difficult, his warhorse Stranger was ill suited for the heavy snows, but somehow both rider and mount arrived at their destination. After a few days he had been brought into the Lord Commanders solar where he spoke for hours, telling him his tale. He had gone years with barely speaking at all, only the occasional quiet word with the Elder Brother. He told Jon everything, speaking until his throat became sore, Kings Landing and his flight after the Blackwater battle, his journey through the Riverlands with the little wolf bitch by his side, and then his years of healing and repentance at the Quiet Isle, and finally even speaking of the dreams that brought him here. 

He knew it sounded crazy, and if this boy commander had any sense he would throw him from the room for even daring to ask to be granted a visit with his sister. But as his story continued he noticed the look on Jon's face grew more and more troubled. A sense of dread began to fill him and he knew then that something was very terribly wrong here. In truth he had sensed it from his arrival. The black brothers were on edge, Stannis was no where to be found, and a terrible red woman had been watching him everywhere he went. She unnerved him more than the cold did, for even far away on the Quiet Isle they heard the stories of Stannis's red Witch and her love for the flames. 

Finally when he was done speaking, Jon cleared his throat. "You heard true, Sansa was here at the wall." 

"Was? As in not here now." Sandor growled, disappointed that his weary traveling had been for nothing. 

"She was here for a time, yes. She told a similar story about her days in Kings Landing and spoke of you with high regard. She seemed to believe you had perished in the Riverlands, she refused to believe you were the butcher of Saltpans. I am relieved to hear that she was correct in her beliefs. I trust this Elder Brother will also be able to confirm your story." 

"I have a letter from him confirming my whereabouts for the last few years." Sandor pulled out the parchment from his pocket and handed it to the boy. Jon looked it over quickly before handing it back to him. Sandor could feel the heavy sadness coming from the boy and he dreaded his next words. But what came next surprised him more than anything. 

"I would like you to accompany me on a ride, I trust that you would not be afraid to go ranging beyond the wall?" Jon said standing and pulling a heavy cloak around his shoulders. 

"No, I do not fear the grumpkins and snarks beyond the wall." 

"You should." Jon said bitterly. "The things I will show you will haunt your dreams." 

"Where are we going?" Sandor asked as they walked toward the stables. 

"I am taking you to see Sansa."


	2. Chapter 2

They rode beyond the wall for a few hours. It was colder than Sandor thought possible. Just crossing the barrier of the Wall seemed to make the temperature drop to an unbearable cold. He must admit that the haunted forest seemed to hold a sort of quiet beauty, with its crystallized trees and soft white snow. They rode throughout the day until dusk was upon them, before Jon finally brought them to a small clearing in the middle of a group of trees. It was here that he dismounted and sat on a fallen tree, his white direwolf setting down at his feet. Sandor came over to stand next to him. 

"What are we doing? There is nothing here?" 

"Here is where we wait. Sit, we will need to wait until dark." Jon said sadly. Sandor sat on the fallen tree. Ghost lifted his head and sniffed at him before butting his head against his leg. He laughed and ruffled his ears a bit. 

"Ghost likes you. He is not normally affectionate with others." Jon said surprised. 

"I have a way with beasts." Sandor said softly. After that they sat in silence for a long time as the sun set and darkness began to overtake them. The moon was full and high in the sky before Jon began to speak. 

He told Sandor his story, about his decision to take the black, the dead men they found in the forest and how they returned to life and attacked the Lord Commander. The tale of the great ranging, White Walkers and walking dead men, and how he went over to the wildlings for a time to learn their secrets. Stories of the great battles fought at the wall, with giants and mammoths. He told about the deal they made with the wildlings and how his black brothers had turned on him, stabbing him and leaving him for dead. Sansa had arrived while he was recovering, and spent her days caring for him. 

"We sat for hours, talking about all that had happened to us in the years that we had been apart. She was so changed from the girl I knew at Winterfell. She had grown up into a strong confident woman. Then suddenly one day I was overcome with fever. I feared I would not live, and perhaps maybe a part of me wanted to just give up and die. Miraculously I did survive, and after I learned what had happened while I was recovering, I wished I would have died." He finally finished. 

"How did she get here? There were times I did not know if I would survive the journey." Sandor questioned. 

"She had been in the Vale with Littlefinger. She fled one day when she learned he had plans to force her into another marriage. She found a ship to bring her to Eastwatch by the sea, and my men brought her to Castle Black." 

Littlefinger. The name alone made Sandor's skin crawl. He hated the fucker and the thought of Sansa being with that whoremonger made him ill. 

He was surprised when Jon put his hand on his arm. "Clegane, I have told you my story so you would understand what you are going to see." 

Sandor was about to ask him what in the Seven Hells he was talking about, when suddenly the air grew crisp. The cold was nothing like he had ever felt before, his breath seemed to freeze in his throat. He gasped for air. "We need to make a fire." he managed to rasp out. 

Ghost jumped up and his fur stood up as he silently growled. Jon stood then. "She is here." he spoke sadly, pointing across the clearing. 

Sandor looked up and saw her walking toward them. She wore nothing but a soft blue wool gown, like the ones she had worn when he had first met her at Winterfell. She wore no coat or furs, just a lightweight white cloak around her shoulders. As the white cloth fluttered in the breeze he saw it was torn and dirty, bloody in spots even. It seemed oddly familiar to him. She moved as though she was floating on air, making no sound as her feet touched the ground. Sandor noticed with horror that her feet were bare. He looked up into her face as she stopped in front of them. He fiery hair floated around her, looking like flames. Her skin was pale and white as milk and her eyes he realized with dread were no longer the beautiful sky blue he remembered. Tully blue everyone had called them. Her eyes were now a ghostly inhuman hue. 

"Jon" she spoke just the one word, and that is when he knew. Her voice was dull, emotionless and flat. Sandor knew then that she was dead.


	3. Chapter 3

"Sansa, I have brought someone to speak with you." Jon said quietly. 

"I am to speak only with The Lord Commander." she spoke in the same dead voice. 

"Sansa." Sandor managed to speak, the word catching on the knot he felt in his throat as he looked at her. She turned her head toward him tilting it to the side slightly as she stared at him, her eyes betraying no emotion and for a moment he feared she did not know him. Then she spoke again. 

"Sandor Clegane. No. The Hound. A girl remembers also being called by another name." 

"Little Bird." he choked out with a sob. 

"You stole a song and a kiss, and left behind only a bloody cloak." With horror he realized the tattered white cloak she wore around her shoulders was his abandoned Kingsguard cloak. 

It was too much for him to bear, he fell to his knees and buried his face in his hands, anything to keep himself from seeing her. He suddenly realized that he was crying, the tears freezing on his face before they could fall. He vaguely heard her talking with Jon, her dull voice speaking words that he could not make out due to the great sobs that were wrenched from his body. 

Out of all the scenarios he had played out in his head of what could have happened to the girl, nothing was worse than this. He had pictured her dead in a ditch, or being defiled by the Imp. Even living as Littlefinger's whore would have been preferable than seeing her as this dead shell of the girl he had known. All the warmth that he had loved about her was gone. 

The air felt warmer again as he felt Jon's hand on his shoulder, and looking up he realized she was gone. They were alone again. 

"How could you let this happen to her." he demanded, wiping frozen tears from his eyes with the back of his hand, embarrassed that his emotions had gotten the better of him. 

Jon knelt beside him. "I do not know how this happened. She disappeared while I was recovering from my wounds. Then Melisandre, the red woman that came with Stannis, she told me that she had seen a vision in her fires of this clearing, and that I would find my answers here." He took a deep breath and sighed rubbing his face with his hands. "She is different from the others. I have never known a wight to speak. She speaks for their leader, talks of peace and an end to the war with the others. She seems to remember very little from her life before. Today is the first time I have ever known her to speak of something personal. Did you understand what she spoke of." 

"Aye, she spoke of our last day together, the Blackwater Battle. The song and the cloak. Gods she is wearing my cloak." he managed to choke out the words. After a few moments of silence between the two he took a deep breath. "Why did you bring me here, why show me this? Do you expect me to kill her." 

"No." Jon shook his head. 

"How can you leave her that way? How can you live with yourself knowing that she is a nothing but a soulless dead creature." he roared. "How do you destroy them? I will not let her suffer this fate." 

"I did not bring you here to kill her, I thought perhaps with the dreams or the visions that you spoke of, perhaps there was a reason you were brought here. Maybe you could help to solve the mystery of what has happened to her. Do you think it does not kill me to see her that way. The last member of my family is dead and it tears me up inside. She is my sister and I love her." Jon frowned and looked at the sky. "We need to go back, it is a few hours ride back to Castle Black." 

"I am not going." Sandor growled. "I will stay here and wait for her to return." 

"What will you do then? The only way to destroy them that we have found is fire." Sandor flinched at the thought and Jon smirked as he noticed. "She may not even return." 

"I will wait for her anyway." Sandor returned to sit upon the fallen tree. "You speak of your love for her. You say you love her enough to let her remain soulless. I love her enough to kill her."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ill admit it lol. the whole, "I love her enough to kill her" line was inspired by a season 1 episode of Penny Dreadful.


	4. Chapter 4

Sandor was surprised that Jon actually agreed to leave him there. He left him with some supplies, a sturdy ax for chopping firewood and a small parcel of food. Before he rode away he gave him an old tattered map and pointed out an abandoned wildling village just a few miles to the east where he might find a cabin to shelter in if needed. 

As the hours wore on, Sandor sat sharping his sword. Every few minutes he would stop and listen to the stillness of the woods around him. It unnerved him how quiet it was. As a soldier he had spent many a night camped out in the forest, and never had he known it to be silent. There was always a howl of a wolf far off in the distance, a rustle of leaves from a passing animal, or the the song of some night bug calling for its mate. Even the wind that blew through these trees seemed to make no sound. It was unnatural. 

As he waited he thought back to her words. "You stole a song and a kiss and left behind only a bloody cloak." He had certainly stole her song, she had not given it freely, and he clearly remembered tearing away the hated cloak that should have symbolized a sacred oath, but a kiss he could not recall. He had dreamed about kissing her more times than he could remember but he never would have dared. He had only kissed a few women in his life, a few of the first whores he had ever purchased. He quickly grew tired of the fake looks upon their faces and preferred to get on with business and be on his way, and he was not paying for kisses. 

True he had gone to the girl's room that night. He was not even sure what his true intentions had been. He was crazed with fear and drunk on both wine and battle. His thoughts were crazy, wanting to both take her away and save her, or to steal her naivety and innocence and kill her after. That night was the single greatest shame of his life. He had never taken a women by force, he was not his brother, and when he realized what he had almost done to her he had fled. The memory of her hand upon his face and her beautiful voice singing and comforting him even while he threatened her with a knife to her throat filled him with guilt. And now after he had seen what had become of her, he regretted that he had not been the man she needed him to be, he was right to leave the Kingsguard cloak behind, a true knight would have rescued her and saved her from this terrible fate. Sandor had always known there were no 'true knights' and sadly the girl had learned that lesson as well. 

If he only did one thing right in his life it would be this. He had failed her in life, he would not fail her in death. 

It seemed the night was never ending, but he knew that dawn would be approaching soon. Just when he began to fear she would not return, he felt the air turn sharp and crisp again with cold and he looked up to see her standing as still as a statue just a few yards from him. He hurried to stand, he did not hear her approach and suddenly he felt unprepared to deal with her presence. 

She did not speak only stood and stared at him. He fidgeted with his sword for a moment, before looking straight into her dead blue eyes. "Sansa." he summoned the courage to say. 

"Why are you here?" she spoke her voice as cold and harsh as the air around him. 

He opened his mouth to answer but no words followed. 

"I am only to speak with the Lord Commander." she repeated her words from earlier. 

"Then why are 'you' here?" he finally managed to say. 

She did not answer at first, just continued to look at him with that eerie blank stare. "You stole a song and a kiss and left behind only a bloody cloak." she stated again, her voice revealing no emotion. 

"Did you return to punish me for that night?" he barked out a laugh. She did not move, only continued to stare at him. "Punish me then Little Bird, and rightly so, I did wrong by you that night." 

"You stole a song and a kiss and left behind only a bloody cloak." she repeated again. 

"Aye you said that already girl." He growled. "Seems like death has truly transformed you into the stupid chirping bird I always took you for." 

"Bird. Little Bird." she spoke. "You stole a song and a kiss..." she began to say yet again before he grabbed her with a growl and interrupted her. 

"You keep saying that, and yes I remember the song, and you wear my cloak around your shoulders, but a kiss, no I did no such thing." He gripped her shoulders tightly. The girl he had known would have cowered away from him, but she stood there in his grasp not even flinching. He could feel the cold coming off of her, it burned in a way that the fire never had, and he had to release her quickly. 

"A girl remembers a kiss. A kiss she compared to all others." 

"Seven Hells." he swore as he backed away from her. He reached down for the ax that Jon had left. For a moment he thought he saw a flicker of something across her eyes, before she spoke suddenly. 

"They will come for me. I should not be here." She turned to walk away, and before she could leave Sandor swung with the ax, hitting her with the flat of the blade, the same way he had once struck her sister. 

She collapsed into the snows. He looked her over, but she took no breath, so he had no way of telling if she was alive, or dead, or simply remained as undead as before. Picking her body up in his arms, he lifted her and attempted to set her onto his horse. The beast bucked and screamed in terror as he tried. Finally he gave up and began to walk, carrying her in his arms, letting the horse follow behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

He finally found the abandoned village just where Jon had told him it would be. After the long walk through the snows, his leg was screaming in pain and he cursed his old wound. He kicked open the door of the first cabin he passed. The empty hut smelled musty and was empty except for a small rickety wooden bed and some broken chairs. He laid the girl down and went to the fire place. He kicked away the ash and remains of the previous fire before snapping apart the broken chairs and throwing the pieces into the hearth. He found a pile of broken sticks and kindling in the corner of the room and soon enough he had a small fire. 

He sat for awhile, warming himself, hoping to rid his body of the aches the cold had brought on. He stared into the flames that had always caused a great fear in him, and then glanced over at the girl where she laid like a corpse on the bed. He tried to imagine pulling a piece of burning wood from the fire and taking it over to her body. Could he truly bring himself to set her aflame? His mind was filled with the memories of his childhood. He shuddered as he remembered the way his skin had melted away from his face, the smell of charred flesh and burning hair, and the sounds of his screams as they filled the room, but mostly the memories were of a pain greater than anything he had ever known. 

As he looked over at the girl again, he felt a new pain, one that threatened to overtake the horrors that Gregor had inflicted on him. Would she feel the same pain? Would she cry and scream as he watched her burn? Could he watch her beautiful porcelain skin crack and burn, her fiery red hair turn to flames as it crisped and burnt away. With a growl he stood and left the cabin. 

After checking on Stranger, and tying him to a tree, he explored the small village, looking in the other few cabins but finding nothing of interest. He had just stepped out of the last one when he heard a scream. The noise was nothing he had ever heard before, an inhuman wail coming from the cabin where he had left the girl. Stranger was snorting in fear and pulling against the ropes that held him. Sandor ran toward the cabin, and throwing open the door he saw the girl. She still sat on the bed where he had left her, but she was pressed against the wall, her eyes wild with fear. She stared at the flames in the hearth and continued to scream. He rushed to her and grabbed at her arms, shaking her. Still she screamed, her eyes never leaving the fire. 

Finally he took her in his arms, holding her close, and whispered quiet words to calm her, the way he would while taming a horse or wild animal. Touching her chilled him to the bone, despite the warmth that now filled the room from the fire. 

"You mean to kill me." she finally spoke as her screams began to fade. He voice was still flat and emotionless, but he could no longer deny that she was unfeeling. He had suspected earlier when he had reached for the ax. He had seen it in her eyes, she could feel fear. He was more confused as ever as he held her tighter. 

"No Little Bird, I mean to set you free."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter I am posting tonight, I am hoping to get the rest of this story done tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im not as happy with this chapter as I was with the last ones, but I am anxious to move on, so here it is.

The girl was calmer now, but she sat as still as stone, eyes fixed upon the flames burning bright in the hearth. Sandor paced the room, asking her questions but she spoke not a word. He was desperate for answers but she seemed paralyzed by fear. He stood in front of her, blocking her view of the fire, but she stared as if she were looking through him and still the terror remained in her eyes. Finally he growled at her in anger and grabbed her arm, yanking her off the bed. He began to drag her across the room toward the door of the cabin. She did not resist and let him pull her limply along, her eyes never leaving the hearth. He pulled her outside and slammed the door closed. The fire now gone from her sight she seemed to recover a bit. 

The wind was blowing strong, swirling snow around them. The air was a bitter cold that took his breath away. He had never seen a snowstorm like this, the force of the winds threatening to knock him over. "They are coming for me, you should not have brought me here." The girl spoke, her words almost lost in the roar of the wind. The cold and wind was unbearable so he growled in anger and walked back into the cabin. He walked to the hearth and began stomping the fire out with his boots, recoiling as ash and sparks flew up towards him. He turned back to her and saw her still standing in the doorway, but the terror had left her eyes, and the blank empty look had returned. He did not know which was worse. 

"There was a woman." she said softly as she stared at him unseeing. "A horrible, terrible woman. A red woman." 

"At the wall? The woman that is with Stannis?" He grabbed her by her shoulders and questioned her. She did not reply but tilted her head and looked at him, as if suddenly noticing him for the first time. 

"Sandor Clegane. You stole a song and a kiss... no, you forget the kiss.. a girl remembers." 

"Seven Hells girl! You want to be kissed." he swore loudly, then pulled her close and pressed his lips against hers. She hung limply in his arms as he kissed her. Her lips were like ice and he felt his breath leave him. His body grew frigid and he felt as if he would never be warm again. Suddenly he felt her lips move against his, as she returned the kiss and a vision of her filled his mind. She was sitting alone on a bed, wrapped in his cloak and he realized he was seeing into her memories. 

Suddenly she pushed against him shoving him away. She took a single great deep breath, her whole body shuttering with the force of it, her eyes wide. "No, you must not do that again! I do not wish to harm you." she shouted as she backed away from him. The cabin began to creek and groan from the great howling winds outside. "They are here. They have come to take me back." she said wrenching open the door and moving quickly she fled from the cabin, into the snowstorm. 

He gasped for breath, his head swimming as he felt the warmth return to his body. He stumbled toward the entrance and looked around for her. The air was quiet and still around him, as if the storm never happened and she was no where to be seen. He tried to call out her name, but suddenly he remembered the memory she had shown him. 

Sandor realized he knew what had happened to her. She had found a way to show him. He had to warn Jon at once.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt very distracted while writing this chapter so I hope it turned out Ok. This weekend is my anniversary so I doubt I find any time to write, so my next update will most likely be Tuesday. This story is coming to an end soon, I am planning 3 or 4 more chapters maybe.

As Sandor rode back to castle black his mind was filled with the vision Sansa had shown him. The memory was so clear and vivid. He could feel her thoughts and emotions, it was almost as if it had happened to him. He closed his eyes and let himself get lost in the vision. 

Sansa had returned to the small room that Jon had ordered prepared for her. She was weary, she could not remember when she had slept last, having spending the last days nursing Jon. He had taken a great turn for the worse and she was terrified that he would not survive. As always when she was troubled, she pulled the old tattered Kingsguard cloak from her belongings. Wrapping it around her shoulders she tried to take strength in her memories of The Hound. 

Her feet were sore, her boots were worn out and they pinched her toes painfully. She kicked them off as she sat on the bed and pulled her wool stockings off as well, rubbing the stiffness from her toes. Suddenly her door swung open, making her jump in surprise. Standing in the doorway stood the red woman. She had been frightened of her ever since her arrival, and the way the woman stared at her made her skin crawl worse than when Lord Baelish had touched her. 

Before she could even offer a greeting to the woman, she had entered the room and took her roughly by the arm, dragging her off the bed. Sansa cried out in protest but could not stop the woman from pulling her outside the room and down the hallway. 

"Please" she cried out as she was forced outside. "Please I have no shoes, Please let me get my boots, it is too cold." she exclaimed as her bare feet touched the cold snowy ground. 

"The Lord of Light warms me. Perhaps if you accepted him into your heart, he would warm you as well." The red woman answered. 

Sansa looked around confused for she saw no one. The entire time she had been living at the Wall there was never a quiet moment. Black brothers were on guard, soldiers practicing their sword work, men tending to horses, and even a giant were constants in the yard. But now the castle was silent, the grounds empty. She screamed out for help trying to fight the woman off, but the grip she had on her arm was too tight. 

"No one will hear you my child. Men are simple creatures, easy to fool. A simple illusion was all it took to have us be practically invisible to all who would be watching." She continued to drag her across the yard and toward the gate that led to the tunnel that would take them to the other side of the wall. 

Sansa screamed and fought against the woman, she reached for her hair, pulling and tearing, anything to force the woman to let lose her hold on her arm, but nothing she did seemed to have any affect on the woman at all. Her feet were numb from cold and she began to lose the feeling in them. The gates at the front and back of the tunnel were both mysteriously open and unguarded and soon enough, Sansa found herself on the other side of the Wall. 

For a moment she looked around, feeling as if she was truly at the end of the world, but the red woman continued to pull her along towards the forest. The snow was deep here and Sansa began to lose her footing, falling to her knees, but the woman never stopped, dragging her through the snows, as if she were nothing more than a sack of potatoes. Sansa beat at her legs grabbing her gown and trying to bring her down into the snows with her. 

Finally the woman stopped after the had traveled deep into the woods, and knelt down beside her. Sansa was shivering, she only wore a woolen gown and the thin white Kingsguard cloak, her feet and hands were burning from the cold. "Why are you doing this?" she cried out. 

"Child, I do this for the greater good. There is power in the blood of Kings. Your blood is the blood of the First men, The Kings of Winter. A sacrifice to the Great Other will help to end the great war. I have seen what is to come in the flames. This is the only way." 

Sansa summoned the last of her strength and lashed out at the woman, but she easily knocked her punches away, laughing. She recoiled then as she suddenly saw through the magic that surrounded her and saw the woman for what she really was. She was not young nor beautiful or even human. Melisandre stood then and walked away leaving her there alone in the woods. 

Sansa was too cold to try and follow. She tried to wrap the cloak around her and a sort of madness overcame her and she screamed for Sandor Clegane. She knew in her heart that he was dead, he had been slain in the Riverlands, Petyr had told her so. Feeling foolish she curled up in the snows as she shivered violently. She was tired from fighting with the red woman and so very very cold. She wanted to close her eyes and go to sleep, maybe when she woke this would all be a bad dream. 

She heard something moving through the trees. Weakly she opened her eyes, and trying to focus she saw the shadow of something large standing before her. It was a creature like nothing she had ever seen before, beautiful and deadly. Her last thought, as the creature bent down to kiss her forehead, was that The Others looked nothing like they said in the stories. 

Sansa did not feel the cold anymore. The cold became a part of her, as she left her old life behind. 

As the memory ended, Sandor opened his eyes. He felt the icy tears on his lashes. He made no attempt to brush them away, just urged his horse to go faster. The sooner he could reach the wall, the sooner he could choke the life from that evil red witch.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry about the horrible delay in updating, I had company staying with me for a week, and then suddenly my Two year old decided to get on board with potty training. Its hard to find time to write when I am running to the potty with him every 20 mins lol. Thanks for reading and reviewing. I think there is 2 more chapters to this story which I will try and have done this week. Thanks again :)

Once again, Sandor found himself seated across from the Lord Commander. Jon stared at him calmly after listening to him tell his story once more. After he had arrived back at the wall, the first thing Sandor had done was look for the red woman. He screamed and pounded on doors, storming around Castle Black in a murderous rage, finally only giving up his search after several of the black brothers had surrounded him and wrestled him down to the ground, explaining to him Melisandre would not be found unless she wanted to be, then dragging him back to the Lord Commander's rooms.

It frustrated Sandor that Jon could be so calm. He had just told him that his sister had been murdered, drug out into the cold snows beyond the wall and left to die, her life and warmth stolen from her by an undead creature. He wanted nothing more than to hit the boy, to make him wake up and be as angry as he felt right now. 

Finally Jon took a deep breath. "Let me see if I understand what you just told me. You claim that Melisandre killed Sansa. Sacrificed her to the Others? Why would she do this?" 

"I told you, some nonsense about power in kings blood." 

Jon nodded. "You claim Sansa showed you this in a vision." 

"Yes, I know it sounds insane." he began. 

"And Sansa gave you this vision when you kissed her." Jon said, a hint of anger in his voice for the first time. "You are telling me that you kissed my sister, my dead sister, and that she gave you a vision of her death." 

"Do not act like I went out and violated her corpse." Sandor growled. 

Jon rubbed his face with his hands. "Do you know the story of the Nights King?" 

"Some children's story right, about a monster that ruled the Wall a thousand years ago. What of it?" Sandor snarled angrily 

"Let me tell you the story how our nurse at Winterfell told it. It was my brother Bran's favorite so Old Nan told it often. The Night's King lived during the Age of Heroes, not long after the Wall was complete. He was a fearless warrior named the thirteenth Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. Later, he fell in love with a woman with skin as white as the moon and eyes like blue stars. He chased her and loved her though her skin was cold as ice, and when he gave his seed to her he gave his soul as well." 

"Do you understand my concern Clegane. That you did not hesitate to kiss one of them. No matter what she looks like, she is not my sister. Sansa is dead, and that thing out there wearing her body is something else." 

Sandor hit the desk with his fist. "Damn you boy, why are you focusing on that and not the real issue. You are harboring the woman that killed your sister in cold blood. For no other reason than some buggering vision she thought she saw in her fires." He pushed his chair back and stood up storming across the room. Jon jumped up and hurried toward him. "If I find the bitch first, she is dead." Sandor growled as he threw open the door and hurried away. 

When he entered the yard he saw her, impossible to miss as she was dressed all in red. She was like a torch burning bright among the darkness of the nights watch brothers all in black. He ran toward her and within moments had her by the throat, raising the woman from the ground. He was vaguely aware of some of the Kings men shouting and threatening him with their swords, but the red woman held her hands up and motioned for them to stand back. 

Jon was there by his side as well begging him to release her. "You would let her live? After what I have told you!" He screamed at the boy.

"What do you believe it is that I have done Lord Clegane?" she rasped out despite his hand choking her as tight as his hand could grip. 

But it was Jon who answered. "Did you kill my sister? Drag her out beyond the wall and leave her to die?" 

Sandor let loose his grip. He wanted to hear the words from her own mouth before he killed her. She smiled for a moment before answering. "Who told you this tale, Lord Commander?" 

"Sansa did!" Sandor growled before Jon could answer. 

Melisandre laughed then, a deep laugh that chilled him to the bone. "Sansa Stark told you I killed her. If the dead girl truly speaks, then perhaps she is not really dead at all." 

Sandor released her and took a step back, suddenly needing to be away from this unnatural woman. She stepped closer to him though, and brought up her hand to cup his burned cheek. "Do not fear me Clegane. The Lord of Light has a purpose for us all. Especially you, one who has been kissed by fire. Believe in him, and he will show you the way." then she turned and summoned her guards back to her side and headed back into the castle. 

For a moment he was tempted to charge back at her, and finish snapping her neck like he had meant to all along, but Jon must have sensed his intent because he stepped in front of him and grabbed his arms. "Let her go." he commanded. 

"How can I let her get away with this?" he snarled. 

"I will discuss it with King Stannis when he returns. He had big plans for Sansa as well, and he will not be happy with this turn of events either." 

"Big plans, you mean he was going to sell her into a marriage to win more support." Sandor growled out. Before Jon could even answer he threw the boys hands away from his arms and hurried toward the stables. 

"Where are you going?" Jon called out. 

"Back to her, I am not going to leave her alone out there." he said as he pulled Stranger from his stall. 

"Clegane, you can not go back out there. You don't fully understand what is waiting there." Jon pleaded 

"I understand enough, and I'll not leave her alone again." He mounted his horse Stranger then headed for the tunnel that would take him back to the other side of the wall.


	9. Chapter 9

The ride back to the clearing seemed to take no time at all despite the miles he had to travel. Sandor looked around at the trees and the snow covered land for a few moments before he dismounted and sat on the fallen tree. He could not believe it had only been two days since Jon Snow had led him to this spot. Two days when his world had crumbled around him, two days since he found out the only good and pure thing he had known in his life had been destroyed. 

The night was cold and darkness was soon upon him. Part of him feared she would not return, but he knew in his heart that she would. He spent his hours sharping his dagger and then his sword. The moon was soon high in the sky, casting and eerie glow down on him. It seemed everything was tinted blue and it reminded him of her eyes, not the inhuman hue they were now, but the way they used to be. Blue like the sky on a beautiful summer day. 

He looked up from his whetstone to see her standing a short distance away. It unnerved him that she could approach him so silently to come upon him unawares. He took note that this time, he did not seem to feel the terrible coldness that seemed to follow her before. She stood silently, hair blowing slightly on the breeze. 

"You came back." she finally said. "Why?" her voice was different, no longer sounding as cold and unfeeling as it had before. 

"Aye. I came back." he said, setting down his whetstone and standing up. He took a few steps toward her, slowly not wishing to scare her. 

"You came back to kill me?" she asked, her voice not betraying the fear he saw on her face and in her eyes as she stared at the bare steel sword in his hand 

"No Little Bird." he said, putting the sword into the sheath. She seemed to relax a bit. "You seem different this time girl." he said. 

"I am sorry, I did not mean to do it. I had to show you what had happened. I gave you a part of me, but I am afraid I stole a part of you in return." she said sadly. 

"I do not understand." he said. "What did you steal?" 

"Part of your soul." 

He regarded her for a few moments. "Could you do it again?" 

"No!" she exclaimed. "Never, I could kill you, or worse, make you become like me." 

"But it would make you better." he said. 

"Better how. This is what I am now. I only remember more of who I was. Before it was only flashes of feelings or memories. Now I remember everything, but that does not change what I have become. I have accepted my fate. You must as well." 

"No, I can help you. We can go south...." he started but she interrupted him. 

"No, I can not cross the Wall. There is magic that forbids it." 

"There are other ways, the Wildlings do it every day. We could go down to Eastwatch and go by the sea." 

She shook her head. "No, I will not survive in the south." 

"Seven Hells girl. I can not just leave you here like this." 

"Do not fear for me. Soon I am leaving this place. I am headed North, to the frozen lands where it is always winter. There are palaces made of crystal where everything sparkles like diamonds. I will not return here again." she turned to leave. 

"No." he said with a growl, grabbing her arm and yanking her toward him. "Damn it girl, there is a reason you called out for me. A reason I heard your call in my dreams, all the way in the south. I will not leave you alone again. Who knows what dangers await you where you go. I will follow you and protect you." 

"You would not survive the cold there." she whispered. 

"There is a way." he said holding her by both arms and looking down into her eyes. 

"No." she shook her head. "You do not know what it is you are asking. You do not want that. Don't ask me to do that." 

"It is my choice isn't it. I should never have left you before. Now is my chance to make things right. I choose to remain by your side and protect you from harm no matter what the cost. It is that simple." 

She stared up at him for a long time. "Why?" she finally whispered. "Why would you do this for me?" 

"You know why." he said reaching out and brushing a piece of her hair away from her face, tucking it behind her ear, and allowing his fingers to weave their way through her fiery locks on the way down. 

Without warning, the winds picked up, blowing snow fiercely around them as she threw her arms around him and lifted herself up on her toes to kiss him passionately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one last chapter to go, I promise to have it up as soon as possible.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone who commented and left Kudos on this story. :)

Three days Jon Snow waited. Three days had passed since Sandor Clegane rode off into the haunted forest. He had hoped that the large man would return. Part of him wanted to forget him. Assume he was lost like so many others who had crossed the wall before him and never returned. But he could not forget, and it haunted his every thought. Finally he ordered his horse to be saddled, called his direwolf to his side and began his journey back to the clearing where he knew he would find his answers. 

He waited hours, longer than he had ever had to wait before for Sansa to arrive. He sat in silence throughout the night until finally he could sense that dawn was soon upon him, could even see a hint of light on the horizon. Then he stood up from the fallen tree only to see Ghost standing with his fur raised. Jon took a deep breath, part of him afraid to turn around. Afraid of what he would see when he did. 

Slowly he gathered his courage and turned. He saw Sansa walking toward him, followed by Clegane and his large black warhorse. The three of them walked silently making no sound. 

"Hello Jon." she spoke softly. 

"Gods Sansa. What have you done." he choked out the words as Clegane turned his face toward his voice. His eyes were cold and blue and as dead as hers. 

"Do not think badly of me, for I did nothing that he did not ask for." she said sadly. 

"You speak differently now." he said. 

"My mind was broken. His love has made me whole." she said. 

"And it cost him his life I see." 

"Oh Jon, you do not understand." she whispered. She turned toward Clegane and caressed his face. He leaned into her touch and raised his hand to touch her hair in return. 

Jon shivered as he watched the two of them together. He heard the warhorse suddenly began to stomp and snort, and Clegane stepped away, reaching out to calm him. 

"The horse too." he exclaimed as he saw the horse turn his head toward him and saw a flash of blue from his eye. 

"Sandor would not leave him behind." she said with a smile. "He loves that horse."

Clegane looked toward her and shook his head. "Little Bird." he grunted out, as he caressed her hair again. 

Jon let out a small cry of anguish despite trying to keep his calm. Part of him could not believe what he was seeing. The wights he had known before were no more than walking dead men, and yet here was the two of them. Both dead but speaking and clearly showing affection for each other. 

Sansa stepped forward and took his hand. Her touch was so cold it burned him even through the heavy gloves he wore. He pulled away from her quickly. She looked hurt for a moment, but then she smiled softly again. 

"We are leaving now, and we shall not return. This is goodbye brother." 

His throat felt too tight to speak, but he nodded to her. She turned and walked back to the horse. Sandor put his hands on her waist and gently lifted her into the saddle, before mounting behind her. Jon watched as they rode silently away, never once looking back. 

When they were gone from his sight he returned to sit on the fallen tree. He sat in silence, as the sun rose and the day grew warmer. Finally when Ghost began to nudge his leg, he stood. He took one last look into the forest, before mounting his horse and riding back to the wall.


End file.
